Anastasiya Minkova collapsed in shock when she arrived home from a trip last September to find that her husband had moved out and taken their two-year-old son.
The US-Russian citizen is now fighting for custody of the child, who CNN is calling Ren to protect his identity.
The last time Minkova saw Ren was six months ago – when they spent 30 minutes together, playing with toys at a children’s home, under the watchful eye of staff.
“My son held onto me tightly and would not let go. He pressed his head against my chest, and it felt like he was relieved to finally see me,” Minkova told CNN.
“When the time was up, I felt completely heartbroken.”
The family had been living on Shikoku island in Japan – a country where, until a law change this April, only one parent could be considered a child’s legal guardian after divorce.
That parent was typically the one living with the child, which encouraged lawyers to advise their clients to flee with their children before divorce proceedings – a practice that could be considered parental abduction in other countries, but wasn’t illegal in Japan, lawyers told CNN.
“If a parent leaves the house with the children, it means the parent will be their main caretaker during the legal procedure. It makes the parent’s position much stronger than the left-behind parent,” family lawyer Masanori Tanabe said.
Japan’s ministry of justice says the new law allows both parents to be recognized as legal guardians and should address the issue of child abductions by requiring divorcing parents to “respect each other’s dignity.”
If they don’t cooperate, and one takes the child, it may count against them in future custody proceedings, the ministry said.
However, several lawyers told CNN it’s unclear how the courts will interpret the law, that joint custody won’t be automatic, and that it doesn’t guarantee shared parenting time.
Campaigners and parents also say it does not strengthen the rights of “left-behind” parents, whose children have vanished into the sole care of former spouses.
Minkova met her now-husband on Facebook in 2013 and joined him in Japan four years later, after they married.
Troubling signs began to emerge in their relationship before she became pregnant with Ren in 2022, Minkova said. After their son’s birth, she said, her husband became increasingly critical of her parenting, demanding he make all decisions on how to raise the child.
Minkova said she had been considering divorce, but when she left to visit family in Russia last September, she did not expect to return to an empty house.
“Looking back, it was the biggest mistake I’ve made in my life,” she told CNN. “But I never imagined that he would use that opportunity to move out.”
Minkova said Ren’s father got in touch with her by text, revealing that he left with their son, and allowed her to see him for one hour a week.
For Minkova, it wasn’t enough.
She said their first meeting was at a mall, then at their family home in Shikoku, but that her husband set the terms. “It’s so horrible because I had to say goodbye to my son every time,” Minkova said. “He would put him in the car and my son would look heartbroken every time.”
After an altercation at a supermarket with her husband over their son, police were called and the case was referred to Japan’s child welfare agency, according to Minkova and a police report seen by CNN.
After several weeks of upheaval, during which Ren spent some time in temporary care, the Japanese government’s child welfare agency returned him to his father, she said.
Minkova is yet to file for divorce, so she officially maintains equal parental rights with Ren’s father, though not equal access.
CNN reached out to Minkova’s husband, who said relevant child welfare authorities in Japan have already been involved in this matter.
“As court proceedings are ongoing and the facts have not yet been determined, I must respectfully refrain from discussing the details,” he added.
The recent landmark revision to Japan’s Civil Code seeks to create more equal rights by introducing the concept of “kyodo shinken” for divorced parents.
“It is hoped that parents will consider their child’s upbringing after divorce from the perspective of the child’s best interests, and that both parents will continue to be involved in the child’s upbringing in an appropriate manner and fulfill their responsibilities even after the divorce,” the Justice Ministry said in a statement.
However, some experts say this is not a quick fix for parents like Minkova.
“The literal translation of the Japanese term ‘kyodo shinken’ is ‘parental authority’ and not ‘parental custody,’” said family lawyer Masami Kittaka, who is not involved in Minkova’s case.
“This means that both parents will have equal rights to make important decisions for their child – when it comes to things like education and healthcare – but there is still no guarantee that they will share parenting time.
“Unfortunately for past cases, unless the parent can prove that there are significant changes to their circumstances, the court will not likely change a solo parental authority arrangement to a joint parental one.”
Not all parents support joint parental authority in Japan; some fear it will force people fleeing abusive partners to maintain a connection with their former spouse.
However, several lawyers told CNN the amendment allows for no contact in cases of domestic violence or child abuse.
Emily Sato, who’s using a pseudonym for legal reasons, said her husband disappeared with their toddler daughter in 2022 shortly after they began discussing divorce.
“One day I came home and found that most of the furniture had been removed,” Sato, a US citizen living in Tokyo, told CNN.
“There was an email stating that he had taken our daughter and moved out. I immediately went to her school but was told she was absent and that I had already been removed from the pickup list.”
By the time Sato’s case was evaluated, her daughter had already been living exclusively with her father, and the court treated that arrangement like a stable environment not to be disrupted, she said.
Kittaka, the family lawyer, said that for foreign parents in Japan, the main challenge is not that they are more vulnerable, but that they often lack proper representation.
“In many cases, foreign parents believe they are discriminated against because they are foreigners. But the court does not discriminate so much based on nationality,” she said.
Instead, language barriers and limited information can hinder their ability to navigate legal situations effectively, Kittaka said.
Despite not having seen her daughter since November, Sato continues to live in Japan. “I cannot bear the thought of leaving my child,” she said.
Sato said the shift in Japan toward joint custody is “an important step in principle” but it’ll only improve the situation if shared access rights are enforced.
“Without meaningful enforcement, legal rights do not guarantee real access, and advantages gained through removing a child may persist even under joint custody, making cases more complicated,” she said.
Jeffery Morehouse, from Seattle, avoids family holidays and weekend trips to the supermarket – times when he’s more likely to be reminded of his son Mochi who he was separated from 16 years ago.
“It’s just too painful,” he told CNN. “I might see other children around the age my son was when I last saw him, and it can bring me back to the first days of his abduction.”
In 2007, in Washington state, Morehouse was granted primary custody of his son, whose nickname Mochi means “rice cake,” and “sweet” or “adorable” in Japanese.
Three years later, his wife relocated with their son to Japan, which Morehouse refers to as a “kidnapping,” according to US law.
“He was six-and-a-half years old,” said Morehouse, who runs the Bring Abducted Children Home advocacy group for American left-behind parents.
“The last time I hugged Mochi, the last time I heard his voice, was Father’s Day 2010. I love you Mochi, wherever you are.”
Morehouse said that the courts recognized his US custody order had legal validity in Japan, and he secured two landmark rulings further affirming this.
But he said that Japan “will not uphold laws and treaties to return children to their rightful home.”
Japan’s Ministry of Justice told CNN it’s been handling cases of international child abduction “appropriately” under the UN treaties and the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction, signed in 2014.
From 2017 to 2025, Tokyo and Osaka family courts issued return orders in 70% of cases at the first instance and 63% on appeal – both above the international average of 59% – a spokesperson said.
However, Morehouse, who has spent more than a decade campaigning for the return of American children abducted to Japan, doubts the amendment to Japan’s Civil Code will bring significant change.
“It does not address the underlying systemic issues, and the structural conditions that enable parental child abduction will remain unchanged,” he said.
“What they should have done was go to the next step and say, ‘We’re creating shared parenting and shared custody and we’re going to figure out a way to make it enforceable.’”
John Gomez, founder of the charity Kizuna Child-Parent Reunion, has been campaigning to protect children’s rights and restore their relationship with both parents in Japan for almost two decades.
Gomez, a US citizen in Tokyo, said the organization has spoken to more than 200 parents affected by the issue with clear patterns emerging “case after case.”
“Family law attorneys counsel their clients to abduct their children. Parental child abduction is not treated as a criminal matter, but a civil matter,” Gomez told CNN.
“Since parental child abduction has not been addressed in this change of Civil Code, even though requested by many Japanese parents, we can certainly imagine that abductions will occur,” he added.
International lawyer Masayuki Honda told CNN that giving both parents guardianship over children after divorce won’t necessarily lead to fewer child ‘abductions.’
“The new law is not effective enough to remove this incentive” he said, pointing to the lack of repercussions for parents who flee.
Minkova also questioned how things will play out in court, especially in her own case as she seeks greater access to her son, Ren.
“In practice, courts may refuse joint custody if parents are not on agreeable terms, which is the reality for many couples going through divorce,” she said.
“In those situations, there is still no guarantee that a child will be able to maintain a meaningful relationship with both parents.”
For Ren, that’s what she fears most of all.
CNN’s Yumi Asada and Ayuka Nitta contributed to this report.
